Vanilla Ice is still around, and there’s a big article about him here. The journalist seems a bit bitter that this is the outcome of all that journalist school, but it’s still a fun read. I was a bit disappointed that he’s denying everything in Ice by Ice, because ever since reading that I’ve been modelling my life after what I thought was his. You know, taking what I learn on the streets and improving on it.
Speaking of Vanilla Ice, I’ve never tasted them, but wouldn’t it be cool if the polar ice caps were flavoured? What with all the global warming and the melting caps and the rising oceans and whatnot, it’d be a decent upside if islanders at least got a delicate seasoning as their homes washed away. I figured out the solution to the rising water levels though – we just have to start digging out the oceans! We’re already drilling for oil, who knows what other good stuff we might find as we haul the sea floor out and dump it in, say, Montana. That makes more room for all the water! I can’t see a flaw to this plan, especially the part where I get a bunch of mega-polluting companies to fund my not-for-anyone-else’s-profit digging corporation so we all look good. They’ll look good for helping to undo the damage they’ve done to the environment, and I’ll look good in my gold chains.
Word to your mother.