Category: HT archives

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This morning, I was preparing my lunch to take to work. I only had a little spoon handy, because I’d have to, I don’t know, open a drawer or something to find something more efficient. It took a while to spoon my food into my lunch container. About as long as it would have taken to eat it, assuming I didn’t chew anything. For some reason, that struck me as somewhat profound this morning. I don’t sleep much.

I had an idea for a website. There’s a lack of support for people trapped on a desert island. For starters, if you’ve watched Castaway, you can immediately see the benefits of quicktime videos for stuff like how to make fire. There’d probably be some kind of discussion board for people that are lonely. Unfortunately, we wouldn’t be able to actually notify the Coast Guard of anyone’s location without violating our privacy policy, but all in all, it’s a developing plan.

Speaking of odd laws, does anyone know if it’s possible to patent a workaround or fix to a Microsoft security flaw? That would amuse me. Many things amuse me.

One thing that doesn’t amuse me in the short term is rebuilding hard drive images. I finally got around to upgrading Sammy the new used Mac’s drive today, after AngelA pointed out that I still hadn’t installed Classic on the “temporary” drive that’s been in use for months. I remember my Windows days where I’d reinstall everything every 6 months or so. Maybe it’s gotten better since then, but I haven’t rebuilt my iMac since I bought it. I’ve found that I don’t miss the procedure. Of course, it didn’t help that I just installed the wrong update and now OS X thinks it’s up to date at 10.1.0 (I was at 10.1.5 this morning)… Important safety tip: Maxtor drives ship configured with the jumper in the wrong spot. I thought I’d burnt it out on the first try, which would make my 3 year warranty pretty handy.

Anyway, as it’s been a day fraught with other people’s problems, I’m going to go take care of mine now. See y’all tomorrow.

Hello, my name is Carlos Delgado of the Toronto Blue Jays. I can put my arm back on. You can’t.

So yeah, went to the ball game. Near as I can tell, pretty much any seat in the Skydome is decent, except if you get high up you can’t tell what’s happening on the far edge of one side of the field. Since our tickets were free, you can imagine how high up we were. Scary high up, that’s how high.

Also scary was the distance we had to go to get snacks, because hey, ball game, need snacks. Due to the incredible attendance levels, we had to go 4 levels down on ramps. Takes a while, I’d say. I decided to have a ball game beer. $6.50, plus I dropped a toonie while paying for the damned thing. Contrast this against the art event we went to before the game, where I could get Steamwhistle for 3 bucks. I like art things. If you have a chance, go to openings. They’re usually on Thursday nights, and they usually have cheap (sometimes free) alcohol. Way good.

Back to the ball game, it was ok. Toronto won 11-1 and they had fireworks when the (4) home runs happened. Getting into the thing was a different matter. You have to check your bags. I wasn’t about to do this, so AngelA waited and I trotted back to the office to drop them off. While I was gone, the guard told her they were doing this because of September 11. Apparently there’s a serious risk of me bringing a rocket launcher to a severely underattended ball game. This is a stadium that has a hotel with rooms facing the field. I don’t believe that the hotel guests have to check their bags. Perhaps the crack security staff didn’t remember that the September 11 terrorists flew first class. Ok, mostly I’m just bitter that I had to run back to the office with two bags while under the influence of art beer.

Today was rapid coding day. I revamped VP’s syndication code while having dinner before heading up to TVA. Of course, I did it wrong. Instead of fixing the code, I got to help out at the local non-profit. All well and good, except I don’t know how much help I’d be if I murdered someone, because that was the likely outcome if I’d have to answer one more phone call. I haven’t talked to that many crazy people in a long time. There are a few types of calls that we get from time to time. It usually takes a few months to collect the whole set. I got doubles. The other fun thing about these calls is that you can tell if someone’s on one of them. My primary duty tonight was to entertain the troops, it would seem. Just to be safe, for the next few days, take my advice and don’t answer the phone. You’ll thank me.

Back to the syndication code thing, I’m starting to learn enough about Perl to learn that there are modules that do most of the stuff that I’ve coded, only better. Today’s lesson was XML::RSS. I figured that since I’m just outputting to a known format, print statements would be good enough, but the code reads so much easier now. Now that I’ve tried generators, I’m going to implement some readers soon. You know, when I have free time.

WHY ISN”T TOMORROW FRIDAY? I’ve been on a “day ahead” cycle all week. Maybe it was the working Saturday night thing. Maybe I should be telling my boss that it’s actually Friday. And that I want company pants.

Oh, pop quiz – who got the “arm back on” reference? The “don’t know it” crowd outnumbered those in the know at TVA 4-3. Sad sad day. I was scared to ask if they knew Stop Drop and Roll. Speaking of “roll”, I saw another “roll/role” mixup in print today, so I think things have balanced out.

I really like the collective consciousness font generator. Check out the animations.

Short entry today, and, thanks to the wonders of editing, I can tell you now that most of it’s about programming.

Yesterday’s musings about content management led to a bunch of investigation on XSLT, which just doesn’t look practical in Perl on my server right now. That’s a mix of opinion and fact, and I guess either could change at any time. I’ve seen some rumours that PHP has some XSLT support, has anyone tried it?

I don’t know why I’m hot to do something in XML, it just seems like something that won’t have to be 100% rewritten when I change my mind. AngelA‘s site has a fair bit of XPath stuff going on, which I don’t regret, but I also wouldn’t necessarily do again… In the meantime, I’m starting to code some Perl packages. I did one for VP, but it was working from an existing package and adding functions. It’s amazing how much harder things can be when you try to understand what you’re doing. For example, did I work on a package or a module? I don’t even remember. All I know is that I was supposed to go to sleep around 10 and I didn’t.

All this extra-curricular coding is an attempt to get away from the world of work, where VB date functions have bit me again. Kryptonite, I tell you. It would appear that assigning a Date variable to a Long drops the time information, since dates are stored in the integer and times are in the decimal. This makes it difficult to calculate elapsed seconds. Why did I assign them to Longs? I didn’t. This is the joy that is someone else’s code. On the bright side, I discovered VB’s regular expression support today, and life became good again. In case you haven’t guessed, I don’t really code a lot of VB…

In other news, I just made some deals at the gym that I’m sure had both parties walking away chuckling “sucker”, which I think is win-win. It works out so that my fees get cut in half and I get towel service, but due to some up front charges I won’t be laughing all the way to the bank until next year. Not bad overall.

Gotta go to that ball game now, assuming our free tickets are any good. All I know is it’s scheduled in such a way that I don’t have to cook. Yay!

All things considered, yesterday morning’s install went ok. “All things” balances out the fact that I got about 3 hours of sleep with the lack of problem reports awaiting me this morning. Granted, I might have gone out partying Saturday night and ended up with 3 hours of sleep and a hangover, but at least I would have had fun doing it. I also discovered that the morning of a late night implementation is a bad time to return to the gym.

I managed to spend a good chunk of yesterday working on a new site design for the much neglected Thrust Labs. It would have worked well with Moveable Type, and I haven’t upgraded since the initial install on HT, but their site says a new version is coming out later this month. Rather than do an upgrade, I find myself waiting for the next release… and thinking about developing content management tools. No good will come of this.

We decided to relax last night and watch a movie. Unfortunately, the movie was Harry Potter. I don’t know how I made it to the end, but the fact that I actually sat through the whole thing is more a testament to my stubborn nature than to the film’s merits. If the guy’s some kind of wizard, shouldn’t he, I don’t know, do some magic? Sure, he flew around on a broom, but I got the impression that you bought the broom with flying ability already installed. I also know why wizards have long grey beards: everything takes a damned long time to do. How much money did this thing make? Sweet crap. Also, I was particularly upset about the conspicuous absence of ninjas. This might have been due to the ninja’s reknowned stealth techniques, but I think they just knew to stay the hell away.

I don’t watch a lot of Star Trek, so I reckon they’re adopting the mantra “If Thrust won’t come to Trek…” – Trek-Style Badges. Does anyone work somewhere that uses transponders so people can see where you are? They were starting to make the news when I was in school (someone dials your extension and the phone nearest you rings, for example), but they seem to have faded away. Possibly something about the desire to have the illusion of freedom in the workplace. I’m sure that the radioactive tattoos will make it all ok.

There are virtually no activities planned for this week. Ok, there might be trip to see a baseball game, but I don’t think that counts as an activity, especially when the stadium is next door. I’ve only seen a game once in my life, and I was grateful for the JumboTron thingy. Not because I was far from the field; just because the Olympics were on and they kept announcing medal winners, so I had something to watch. Assuming we go, I’ll let you know if my opinion of the sport changes.

Well, the email I was waiting for last night never came. I just walked to work to make sure everything’s ready for tonight’s install, and I have no idea what’s going on or who to contact to see how things are going. All I know is I’m turning a service off before midnight and some time after that, but definitely before 7 am, I will be contacted by means unknown to me. Carrier squirrels might be involved; they’re pretty resourceful. After I have been contacted by rogue ninjas, I will verify the installation of an application that I don’t actually understand, one that appears to my untrained eyes to have actually been installed already, despite assurances that that was impossible. After I am convinced that I don’t know what’s going on, I’m going to call someone in another province and have them check it out for me over the phone, to verify that it works somewhere other than on my desk.

A simple, well-laid out plan this is not.

So, how’s everyone else spending their weekend?

Oh, I take back my macho “I don’t need cheat codes, they just save me time” routine from yesterday. I need cheat codes. I need weapons and vehicles that are not accessible to mortal man. I need these every 5 minutes, because I keep losing them. In fact, this might be part of my problem with tonight’s install – this is all normal behaviour from an outside vendor, but I just can’t cope without cheating. I’m going to spend the next few hours looking for the “reverse time and beat management over the head for deciding to outsource things that weren’t our ‘core competency’ to people who don’t know any more than we do” key sequence. I think it’s up down left R1 gnash teeth snarl.

Any typos in this or previous posts are attributed to the environment, because there’s apparently an epidemic of poor editing going around. I’ve read 2 newspapers and a magazine today, and they all have errors in them, even though they have actual budgets. My typos are deliberate, so as not to make them feel bad. Just in case I am in fact insane, when someone takes an active roll in an organization, does that refer to choosing the yeast doughnut over the cruller?

My schedule, much like my underwear, is ever changing yet always entertaining.

We didn’t make it to the .moneen. show Wednesday, but we were able to take in The Golden Dogs‘ set last night. I thought that they were playing a little softer than usual, but then I realized that I was giving earplugs a try. A simple extraction was all that was needed to enjoy the band in their entirety. It’s not so much a volume thing (although they can blast out sound with the best of them), it’s more the subtle layering that can take place when you’ve got 4 microphones live. Anyway, it was a great time, but I’ll admit I’m tempted to tell you that they sucked so nobody will come to the shows and I’ll get an unobstructed view of the band and there won’t be a lineup at the bar. If you don’t come see them soon you’ll have to cope with a big arena and a 500% concession markup someday and you’ll be wondering what a bar show would have been like. Of course, as discussed, if you don’t come to the shows now there might not be an arena gig, so the way I see it, now’s the perfect time. Be sure to ask your travel agent about the new Golden Dogs travel package. It includes airfare, hotel, tickets to the show, and a litre of So Nice soy milk. With a deal like that, how can you seriously consider Hedonism II?

Speaking of the Hedonism resort chain… I’m at work, so finding a link could be dangerous, but if you didn’t know, it’s a resort that markets itself as a place to get laid. You know, just like the Food Fair. Anyway, the marketing isn’t as explicit as it should be — I had a coworker who was flipping through the resort catalogue and she thought that this would be a perfect place for her honeymoon. We managed to convince her that this was a place to get laid with people you don’t already know. Good times.

In another form of Hedonism, I managed to fit in a bit of PS2 time last night before the show. GTA 3 is fun. I found the tank cheat code. Tanks are fun. Except when they fall on you. No fun there. I’m seeing magazine articles about the next version of the game, so I figured I should stop randomly beating people up and get on with the missions so I can be ready for more mayhem. And yeah, I’m using cheat codes. I actually don’t think they’re really necessary, they just keep me from having to learn which button does what. I’m forgetful, and I don’t play very often, so sometimes it’s nice to have a few extra health points while I try to figure out which button fires the gun.

Off-topic note to spammers: your catchy subject lines aren’t going to lure me in if you send me ten copies of the same message.

I have some other links that were interesting, but they’re at home. I’m basically sitting here waiting for an email from an external vendor with contact information for this weekend’s implementation. As near as I can tell, I have to come in before midnight Saturday, flip a switch, go home for a nap, and they’ll page me when they’re ready for the next step. Sometimes it pays to live near the office. Of course, if I lived an hour away someone else would get the task, but this way I look like a nice guy, which can’t hurt when there’s a big lottery draw and your coworkers might have the winning ticket. Do good deeds often, because you never know if someone’s going to become a millionaire, that’s what I say. Now that the dot com thing is over, can people become millionaires without the use of lottery products?

With all the intellectual property debates going on, here’s a question: can you patent a “method of committing suicide”? I took a quick walk through the US Patent Database, and it depressed me a great deal. The trouble with a suicide patent is that if you can prove that someone used your technique, the insurance companies won’t pay, so I guess there’s not a big financial incentive for this kind of IP. I’d like to patent “method whereby one invents something and lets other people use the idea, which may seem very obvious, without hassling them”. Incidentally, the Canadian Intellectual Property Office website is cooler than the US one. Perhaps that’s why our patents are more expensive.

Ok, no sign of that email I’ve been waiting for, so I’m going to just wing it tomorrow night. I’ll be sure to let y’all know how it turns out.

Shiver me timbers, it be talk like a pirate day! Arrr!

So was I being enterin’ the entry last night? Narr. Tired I was, from all the deck swabbing. Them land lubbers .moneen. I did not see, for the line be long and the guest list be short. Signs I did see, and arrr, though the story be stupid, the scary bits harkened me back to my days on the high seas, where the Admiral of the Black did lurk o’er every wave.

The booty for the day be BBS Mates. It be much like Classmates, but it be something I actually remember doing in the 80’s. Three boards from me old hometown I have already found, though methinks they were pulled from yon treasure map that was FIDO something or other. Good times.

This be tiring work, typing like a pirate, and I’ve half a mind to have the inventors walk the plank. Arrr, no need to hang the jib though, on acocunt of links like this and this, which do help.

Um, arrr.

Hi, I’m Herman Thrust. You might remember me from such pointless medical procedures as “what’s my iron level at”? Nope, my energy levels are great, it’s just something I told myself I’d get checked one of these days, along with B12. The doctor chuckled when I said I take “the odd pill once in awhile”. No idea what that means. He also said, “I don’t know how you got that. Here’s a prescription though.” Funny man. That last bit was just to see if my mom’s reading. Funny me. Anyway, if I don’t hear anything in the next few days, I’m the picture of health. That or my phone’s been disconnected.

So yeah, I’m back with coverage of my internet travels.

Not only is September 19 talk like a pirate day, it’s also life-threatening allergy day. Ahoy matey, pass me yon peanuts.

Let me get this straight: Washington claims is wants to disarm Iraq. Iraq says ok, come on in and see that we’re disarmed. Washington says that’s not good enough, and insists on getting the UN to grant them “authority to use ‘all appropriate means’ to force Iraq’s disarmament“. This is a country that knowingly destroyed Iraq’s drinking water system last time around. I wonder what “means” might be considered “appropriate” this time around.

While waiting for my server’s DNS to work properly, I had a chance to read George Orwell’s Politics and the English Language. Seeing thoughts like “in our time, political speech and writing are largely the defense of the indefensible“, and realizing that our time was 1948 brings me down a bit…

On a semi-related theme, I love online newspapers, but I wish they’d make a better distinction between news and opinion pieces, if there are actually distinctions anymore. Bits like “Unless council members are out of their minds, they will reject the recommendation and allow the college to proceed” (link) make it clearer, but not until I’ve started reading the damned thing with an impression that there’ll be objective thought. Granted, this article starts off with a decent clue, but still, have mercy on the dim witted such as myself.

It’s been about 62 degrees at work for the past two days. We have these fun employee satisfaction surveys that go out every year, and I’ll have my chance to voice my concerns there, except, oh, wait, every year they drop questions that they don’t score well on, or they change the scoring system so they can boast year over year improvements. I love my job. Just kidding, no I don’t.

Upcoming potential appearances for the Thrust include catching Signs tonight at the Paramount, .moneen. at Tequila Lounge tomorrow night, and The Golden Dogs Thursday at the Horseshoe. I’m unsure of Friday, AngelA has her Industrial Strength opening Saturday (guess I should add that to her web site, um), and Sunday night it’s the world of work for an implementation that our outside partner claims will be ready for testing and verification “sometime between midnight and 7”. Lather, rinse, repeat.

What’s that? The food fair? Yeah, it was fun. I’ll talk about it in October or so.

Hey, if you haven’t guessed already, I’m at the Food Fair this weekend, it’s going really well, and I’m getting some interviews down that are way better than these, so be patient and I’ll probably talk to y’all Monday.