Are there any vegans or vegetarians out there who don’t play the grocery game? Who doesn’t do a quick scan of the purchases of the stranger in front of you at the checkout, looking for meat, egg and dairy free selections? For some it’s a game for singles, but apparently it’s become my obsession. Be they man, women, child or mongoose, I relentlessly observe, because if I actually see a vegan food order, it’s like winning the lottery. I don’t have any plans to talk to anyone during the event, unless – oh, wouldn’t this be weird – they’re playing the same game with my plastic bags of greens and nuts and grains, in which case I don’t know what would happen. It’s like vegan motivation too – today I saw an early-thirties woman buying a bunch of those Michelinas or however you spell them TV dinners (all with meat and/or cheese), and a big thing of Metamucil. It averaged out to something like six bucks an item, and damn, why are you buyng Metamucil in your early thirties? I think to date I’ve only had two vegan “wins”, which, granted, is more times than I’ve won the lottery, but still, I think I’m scoring ok. You know, “scoring”, as in getting points. At the grocery game.
In the other sense of scoring, it’s always interesting how one can have a sense of mastery over inter-gender communication (and non-communication) when one is attached and has no actual interest in or need for reciprocation. In other words, I’m happily living with AngelA, and I’m convinced that women (and what the hell, possibly men) hit on me all the time. If I was single, I’d be wrong, but for some reason I’m sure I’m right every time, because there’s no risk involved. I subscribe a little bit to the concepts used by people who do affirmations and stuff – I believe that one can script reality freely, except I think it can only be done so that it doesn’t affect your life whatsoever.
I feel like I should have a “lastly”…but I don’t.